The Truth Comes Out (Blue, Closed)

The day had started like any other, with Ethan up just before the sun, watching Blue sleep before her internal alarm woke her up. Ethan laid on his side watching her chest rise and fall with only the slightest snore coming from her every ten or so breaths. No matter how peacefully she slept, Blue always managed to end up with a tangled mess of hair by morning no matter what she did, it was enough to make "John" smile at the serene visage of his lover.

With a soft sigh he let his fingertips play with her hair, not disturbing her in the slightest. It had been a couple of weeks since they had traveled up to the arctic hellhole formerly known as Massachusetts and Blue's pelvis and legs were really healing well. He was eternally thankful for whatever the Shepard had done who had visited her, Liam - Neona's boyfriend, and through some magical whatsit prevented her paralysis.

That fight with the android, Andromeda, had changed everything for Ethan Kelly. For a long time, he had considering loving Blue on a permanent basis. Prior to those thoughts, she had merely been a sweet body to stare at while trying to steal her work. Then she had risked her own life to save his...and she hated him then. Never feeling compassion or caring like that from another, Ethan had quickly developed true romantic feelings and had begun reconsidering his mission. Finally, after the android attack, after he had almost lost her completely, Ethan had made a decision.

"John Rivers" had to die.

The charade was over...he was going to tell her. Reveal it all. Starting today, Ethan Kelly was going to lay himself at Blue's feet, and hope for mercy. He didn't want the mission, Paladin, any of it anymore. Niara Tiran was his world now, and he hoped he could keep it that way.

Blue's face scrunched like it did right before the alarm went off, and Ethan leaned in for a kiss to wake her with. He felt her kiss back, running her fingers through his hair before the kiss broke. They sat there, nose to nose, for a moment before her eyes opened. "John" smiled at her.

Good morning beautiful.

Blue Tiran was plagued with dreams. She supposed that they were more in the realm of nightmares. But, there were no scary monsters, or death. There was only blackness. The kind of blackness that had absorbed her when she had been crushed in the avalanche of her building when the android had blown it up. When she had been writhing in pain, in so much agony that her body overloaded, and she fried all the sensors in the immediate area.

She was lucky to be alive. Luckier, still, to be able to walk. Or waddle as she liked to think of it as. The healer, that was dating her sister had done an amazing job. Because of him, she would be able to walk again, fully with the proper physical therapy. She was working at it. Every evening ended in sore muscles and an exhausted Blue who would take a bath to relax and then fall asleep in bed to relive the darkness once more.

Blue, sighed and her face scrunched up softly as her internal alarm systems went off and her eyes began to open only to flutter back closed when she felt his lips on hers. Softly, she kissed him back until it broke and he was awarded with a smile. Blue-green eyes fluttered open to look over at him. She gave him a soft smile and ran her fingers through his hair.

This was the best part of her day. Before she moved anything below her waist, there was a blissful numbness throughout. Before her body and her nerves woke up and realized that her pain meds had worn off, it was like a blissful moment of the day. The second best was her evening bath, where she and John would sit and talk about their days or laugh, sometimes watch a movie.

Blue's back was killing her though, through out the night she slept mostly in one position. So when her back ached in the morning after her body fully woke up she would turn over on her side facing John and that was when the pain would begin to radiate throughout her lower half. Though, day by day she was getting better. Walking easier, being able to make it longer distances without the walker, or her cane. Soon she wouldn't need the walker at all.

You look so happy this morning. Should we go down for breakfast? I was thinking we could put some of those waffles in the toaster, and have some of the fruit you got yesterday at the market.

She gave him a smile, pulling him close, she kissed him on the lips again. Long, slow, and sensous. John was an amazing man and Blue was very lucky to have him in her life. When the kiss ended, she worked herself up into a sitting position, and to take the strain off her waking sore muscles she used her hands to help her get her legs over the side of the bed where her walker waited. She used it heavily in the mornings and evenings, the rest of the day she could mostly just use her cane.

Ethan smiled at her as she pulled him in for another slow, long kiss. It was moments like this that all but cemented the decision he had made in his mind. Blue was the person for him above all others. She loved him, cared for him, didn't take his crap, and could understand him and his problems at a blueprint level. Besides, it was always nice when you were dating your doctor, and he was doing far more than dating to his cybernetics technician.

You look so happy this morning. Should we go down for breakfast? I was thinking we could put some of those waffles in the toaster, and have some of the fruit you got yesterday at the market.

Her blue/green eyes sparkled as she spoke. Blue had been talking about the various things they could do with the fruit since he had purchased it. It seemed like a trivial thing, but Blue had been surviving on the worst kind of nutrient mush for nearly a month. Fruit, spices, maple syrup...those were new found luxuries for her as she was slowly augmenting her diet to include actual food.

Of course we can, you gonna be ok to get downstairs? I'll get breakfast started while you get yourself ready.

Confirming she was alright, Ethan headed downstairs to the kitchen. He knew what Blue's response would be to the question, but he always made sure to ask. She hated admitting she needed help sometimes, well...all the time. The important thing was psychological, Ethan made sure she knew he was there for her, always.

As he retrieved the various foodstuffs from the pantry and the refrigerator, "John" began to do something he hadn't done in a long time: whistle. As he set the butter and syrup to warm on the counter and began slicing the fruit, a tune was carried from his lips of happiness and ease. The song itself wasn't any sort of metro-pop hit or ballad, but simple happy music. Waffles dropped in to a warm toaster as the music continued.

Ethan had to admit it...freedom felt good.

Blue nodded.

She would be fine. She purposefully put her pills in the bathroom so they would take longer to get to, because, she wanted to be able to handle the pain. Waiting happily for the day that she would not need them at all. But healing, even with a half elf, took time and that time was coming slow. Once she reached the bathroom she leaned in her walker, perching slightly on the side of it as she fished out her two blue pills and one green pill for the day. She wouldn't pill up again until this evening which was a lot better than the four times a day she started with.

Taking her pills with some water. She carefully got herself into a pair of loose slacks. Anything with weight, or too tight, hurt, so she did her best with things that were loose fitted. Grabbed a black sweater to compliment her grey slacks she deemed herself ready enough until the trial of putting her shoes on came later. Making her way down the stairs was a slow process. She could not use the walker, so her cane, laying by the door was her ticket down.

Between her cane on one side and the banister of the stairs on the other she took the stairs one at a time. Finally, downstairs she could smell the food and the waffles that were cooking. Syrup, the best smell in the world to her, not to mention the fresh fruit and berries he had picked up for her. Last night she had eaten an entire pint of icecream, and enjoyed every single bite of it. It was bliss she had forgottten existed.

In the kitchen, she sat down on the barstool that looked over the kitchen and lay her cane to the side. Proud that she had both made it down the stairs without having to stop and that she was not shaking by the time she made it to the stool. Small strides with large impacts. She watched John moving and whistling around in the kitchen, a smile lit her face.

It was great to see the love of her life so happy.

So... are we pregnant or something? she tossed out there for shock value. I mean, I've never heard you whistle while you cook, so I'm trying to figure out what today has that another day doesn't. So... I'm thinking, maybe you're pregnant and you haven't told me. And that's okay if you want it to be a surprise and all, I'm a very good actress afterall. she grinned over at him. Loving the mood he was in.

"John" kept himself rather busy in the kitchen and didn't take too much notice of Blue climbing on to the barstool. In the time it took her to descend the stairs, he had almost completed a plate for her. Three waffles, held together by butter cement, acted as stairs for the cascading maple syrup and pieces of banana, strawberry, and blueberries. Accompany it with a glass of calcium-reinforced milk and orange juice as he did every morning for her, Ethan smiled at himself.

I should hire an announcer to declare this a 'part of a well balanced breakfast.'

So... are we pregnant or something?

Blue's sweet voice made him stop and look over his shoulder with a smile and a raised eyebrow. He didn't make any remark until she continued.

I mean, I've never heard you whistle while you cook, so I'm trying to figure out what today has that another day doesn't. So... I'm thinking, maybe you're pregnant and you haven't told me. And that's okay if you want it to be a surprise and all, I'm a very good actress after all.

Laughter simply fell from Ethan's mouth in droves. Not realizing that his good mood was so apparent, he regarded Blue simply with a smile.

It was supposed to be a surprise...but yes. Its triplets!

With his exclamation of triplets, he placed the masterpiece of breakfasty goodness in front of her, accompanied by the two cool glasses of beverage. She would want coffee, she loved coffee, but she knew she had to consume the juice and milk before she got her precious stimulants.

Don't give me the look, you know the coffee is brewing. Drink your milk and juice and then we will talk about coffee.

She always gave him crap about coffee, but today he didn't care. Fixing his own plate, Ethan sat next to her and leaned in to kiss her softly on the cheek. As he began to eat his own waffles and fruit he looked over to speak to her.

Is it really weird that I'm in a good mood? I have you back, you're getting better by the day, work as gotten us a semblance of normalcy. Its like the stress is melting away. Plus, the taste of Android hydraulic doesn't permeate my taste buds anymore.

He winked at her as he put a moist, yet crunchy bit of syrup covered waffle in his mouth. Yes, the stress of life was finally subsiding.

Blue smiled warmly as he put the plate of waffles in front of her claiming they were triplets. It was sweet, the way they could enjoy one another, and they didn't have to always be at each other's throats. They fought, sometimes, but it was usually only about something important. Otherwise, they were sarcastic and tended to tease each other mercilessly. She wouldn't have it any other way.

He put a glass of milk and orange juice in front of her. She didn't see 'yummy' looking at those. She saw Calcium and Vitamin C. With capitol letters. Because, that's what he was actually feeding her. The berries were antioxidants. It wasn't about yummy yet, soon it would be, but not yet. It was about healing and feeding her body enough fuel to continue her on whatever path of healing her body was on.

He gave her the 'father voice' as she called it about her orange juice and milk. She was really getting tired of drinking these daily. Grabbing the orange juice, the tastier of the two having never really cared for milk, she chugged it down quickly. Getting it over with she dove into her waffles. Three delicious syrup covered waffles and they were alllll hers. He had slathered on the butter. Even though she knew he was trying to give her body fat to fuel the healing, she couldn't find the time to care with the fact that it really was so tasty.

Chasing every waffle bite down with her milk helped her down the milk before she looked expectantly at John. She'd been a good girl, now she deserved her reward. He sat next to her, and now she had a steaming cup of coffee, the aroma alone relaxed her in ways that nothing else could. It was like a comfort food for her she supposed. He told her everything was going so well. She was alive, and healing. The taste of android no longer permeated his mouth, causing her to grin.

She had heard stories and watched broken footage of the attack on security cameras. She hadn't seen it all, most of the buildings had been destroyed, some she had accidentally shorted out their systems because of the pain, especially when the android merged with her mind and they both screamed. But she had gathered enough to see how bad it was, and what John had done here and there. She never asked for the full story, she supposed they weren't ready to talk about it yet. Not that it was a big bad thing in the middle of the room, just, they both had suffered a great deal that day.

No, you're fully allowed to be happy. I kind of like you this happy it's just strange you're more of the hot brooding type. she teased as she dug another tasty bite of waffle off her plate and popped it into her mouth.

Soooooo since you're in such a fantastic mood, does that mean we get to do something today besides sit in this house? Liiiike go out somewhere. I think I can handle a small trip somewhere. Besides, I've been doing work just fine in the lab, and getting my own parts. I think I deserve an outting.

Ethan ate his waffles in relative quiet, watching her do the same. The glare she gave him about the withholding of coffee made him smile, nearly as much as her ecstatic reaction to actually receiving the dark beverage. They chatted as they had almost every breakfast, generally enjoying each others company. The attack had brought many things to their relationship, including a deep appreciation for one another. It was things like that which made Ethan's decision to discard "John" all the easier.

He knew she had wanted to see tapes of the android attack, and he knew that he was a major player in whatever tapes they did end up finding. In either case, she never asked about them. Blue had seemed so insistent about finding the tapes and watching the events unfold as she could never see them, yet she had never questioned him...it had always made him consider why. Then again, Ethan always figured she would ask when she was ready; Blue was never one to skirt around an issue.

No, you're fully allowed to be happy. I kind of like you this happy it's just strange you're more of the hot brooding type.

Eyebrow now fully raised in curiosity, "John" slowly turned his head and looked at Blue's ridiculous smile she had when she tried to hold back laughter. She really did crack herself up sometimes.

Brooding? Since when am I brooding? I prefer to consider it the strong, silent type. You know...the kind that can kill you.

Soooooo since you're in such a fantastic mood, does that mean we get to do something today besides sit in this house? Liiiike go out somewhere. I think I can handle a small trip somewhere. Besides, I've been doing work just fine in the lab, and getting my own parts. I think I deserve an outing.

A smile cracked Ethan's normally brooding facade as he shook his head at her. She really did act like she was a teenager under some sort of house arrest when it came to her injury. It made Ethan feel like an overbearing parent...and generally the bad guy. Hell, when she devoured the pint of ice cream the other night, she looked as excited as a seven year old who was told she could stay up an extra hour. At the same time, however, when she got the inevitable ice cream headache...it was all Ethan's fault.

It was like being the mean parent and the boyfriend all at the same time!

I bet we could go do something relaxing. You didn't want to go to work? I know how you've been itching to play some more with Albert and his flight controls...or his bird rage...or whatever.

Albert had been having issues flying and, it seemed to "John" anyway, that the bird was feeling frustrated. Despite its lack of emotions from being mechanical and whatnot, it still seemed to nip and peck at the bodyguard all the more.

Rising from the counter, Ethan began cleaning up and washing dishes as he poured Blue cup number two of coffee.

If you wanna go out, go do your leg exercises and shower up...no time to spare, missy.

If he was gonna be the overbearing father, might as well milk it a little, at least while she was too crippled to smack him.

Silent and strong... brooding... same difference.

She grinned as she watched him absorb that. She really did want to go have a good time today. Normally, she would be starving for work, but the thing was, today, she just wanted to enjoy John's good mood. It wasn't that he was never in one, it was just that it seemed they were always faced with something. Either work, or a fight, or someone needed something, and there was always something going on that made it so hard to really enjoy themselves.

So she figured that today was a good day for that. He mentioned something relaxing and a thought occured to her.

What about the garden? We could take the riverboat over again. It's nice and relaxing. There is that boardwalk over there, and we could get something to eat for lunch then head back.

She did want to work on Albert. He was coming along, but she was also making a great deal of upgrades to him because she figured that if any time was the right time it was while she was rebuilding most of him. While at first it had seemed as though it was only the wing that was broken, upon further inspection she realized that he had been fried in her mental melt down with the android.

So she was rewriting everything and still trying to work out some of the kinks.

He sent her upstairs to do her exercises and Blue groaned as she slid off the stood and made her way withher can back over to the staircase. She really hated doing the work outs. She knew that they were supposed to help her legs, but half the time they ended up with her shaking in pain despite the meds or in near tears. It was hard for her to do all of this stuff. Harder still for her to be such a weak person. Blue never saw herself as weak and now it seemed that was all she ever felt.

Ugh! I hate you! she teased in true teenager fashion as she began to head up the stairs not quite stomping but she made sure that every time her cane hit the floor it hit the floor loud just to prove a fun little point. When she got upstairs she sat down and got out the equipment she had to use for her legs. It folded up and slid underneath her bed for easy storage but she hated the damn thing anyway.

Setting it up she climbed in and began to work. One leg at a time the physical therapist had told her. That way she could give one a break and do the other one. Blue grunted, and her leg shook inside the pants that she wore because while she was healing she was still quite weak and there were weights to offer resistance to this whole situation. She didn't mind though, so far, it was helping, it just hurt. She would just have to wait for John to tell her that she had finished her workout and they were ready to go.

Rolling his eyes at her comment, Ethan continued to scrub dishes and silverware. They had a dishwasher and, despite the improvements Blue had built in, some pieces still needed pre-wash. Like, for instance, flatware covered in sugary syrup.

What about the garden? We could take the riverboat over again. It's nice and relaxing. There is that boardwalk over there, and we could get something to eat for lunch then head back.

He nodded as she spoke. It was a nice relaxing spot, where they had initially had admitted feelings for one another. The only negative was the sheer amount of walking...walking didn't really agree with her, whether or not she admitted it.

The riverboat and gardens are a good idea...

Blue gave him a look, like she could feel the 'but' coming.

...but its a lot of walking, and its a bit of rougher terrain. I'd love to spend the day with you there, but I know by the end of the day, I'll be carrying you. I don't mind it, but I know that will instantly ruin your day. We can't afford to squander the day on bad feelings.

She played her part, acting like a spoiled teenager, trudging up the stairs. Ethan simply chuckled and completed the dishes, thinking on an alternative. Running various ideas through his head, he settled on a couple of ideas and walked upstairs. Slowly entering the bedroom, he watched her workout for a few moments before she saw him. She hated being watched. Ethan moved quickly to her and kissed her softly.

I love you. You're so amazing. How's the Librium city park, with the zoo? What do you think?

Once she had agreed to the plan, Ethan jumped in to the bathroom and began to take a shower. It was going to be a good day.

Oh but she could feel the 'but' coming.

Unfortunately, he was right. All the walking would be hard on her. He was also right that by the end of the day it was likely he would need to carry her. He was again right when it came to the point of fact that it would ruin her day to be carried like an invalid. She went upstairs and began to work out.

When he came up the stairs she stopped. He knew that she didn't like him to watch she felt weak and that was all ready hard enough. It was worse if he was watching and saw how weak she was. Not to mention, that if he saw her legs shaking he might believe that she was too weak to go anywhere. She couldn't stay in the house another day.

He mentioned the zoo, and she thought that would work. At least it would be something different and there were a lot of places she could sit down when ever she might need to let her legs rest.

Okay, the zoo sounds good. Go get cleaned up and whatever. I'll change into something easier to zoo in, and we'll head out.

When he was in the shower, she stretched out her legs, so they wouldn't get all knoted up. Getting up she worked her way over to the closet and changed her pants out for come capris. There were some scars on her legs, but she knew they would fade over time. Still, they would be easier to walk in and while the weather was starting to turn chilly it would warm up with the day. So she decided on a long sleeve shirt, a vest, and her black capris. She was going to have to use her cane anyway.

She waited for him downstairs putting the lotion on her legs that was supposed to induce her healing nature and help the scars fade. She hoped they would. She didn't want to be nasty looking. She wanted to at least, not be the kind of woman that would turn her boyfriend away because she had scars, at least, temporarily. When he got downstairs she gave him a bright smile and stood. They had a spare walker in the trunk of the Tank so if they needed it for some reason they had it. But she planned to use her cane as much as possible.

It would be a good workout anyway.

Hey, ready to go visit your family? I mean... the zoo. she grinned as she took his hand and they headed out. While she got down the stairs he was able to get the car out of the garage and idling by the curb so all she had to do was get in.

Okay, so next house, no stairs. So that way, if a robot crushes one of us again, less work. she laughed softly as they headed off for the zoo.

Ethan jumped in the shower, and enjoyed the cascading hot water while he scrub the previous day's dirt and grime away. Something about the fifteen minute showers he had been taking gave him some time to actually enjoy the smells of the shower and the feeling of getting clean. After a thorough washing, "John" quickly and completely toweled off, and wound the towel around his body. Walking in to the bedroom, he quickly changed in to a decent polo shirt and slacks.

He quickly walked down the stairs, seeing Blue sitting on the couch applying her healing topical lotion. Ethan wasn't sure what it was supposed to do, but he knew that Blue was rather adamant about using, always blabbering on about being 'desirable' or something. As if she wasn't desirable in the first place! With all the knowledge that had been downloaded in to his mind over the years, none of his training had prepared him to love a woman. Especially a woman like Blue Tiran.

When she finally noticed him, she rose and smiled big in his direction. Whenever she smiled like that he knew it was either because she was really happy, or she had thought of something she found rather funny.

Hey, ready to go visit your family? I mean... the zoo.

And there it was. They held hands as they walked down the longer flights of stairs down to the car she affectionately called Tank. Ethan brought the car out, making it a slightly easier trek to the vehicle. As she entered the vehicle, she smiled at him once again.

Okay, so next house, no stairs. So that way, if a robot crushes one of us again, less work. She chuckled and he merely shook his head and began driving towards the park.

Next house? Since when are we committing to a place that would be considered 'next'? Doesn't your sister's taste in living venues appease you? Besides, no robot crushed either one of us. You were saved by a filing cabinet and the insane strength of some clunky bodyguard.

I...on the other hand, performed heroically.

He really didn't feel heroic, but lets face it...Ethan was more full of shit than most. As they pulled in to the parking lot nearest to the zoo, Ethan leaned in to his amazingly strong woman. She'd never believe him if he told her, but he was constantly proud.

By the way, my parents are really looking forward to meeting you. There aren't any stairs...but don't worry. I'm just gonna toss you in an animal pen. You can find them on your own.

Blue blushed.

He had totally called her out on the fact that she had said 'next house'. As if she expected they would still be together in the future long enough that they would be interested in finding a new place. She figured that at some point they would wanted to find something that would be just for them. Afterall, they would want to start their own life. In a new home, that they picked out together.

Blue didn't answer, she felt too embarassed to answer so she just let him drive while she relaxed in the car. She was thankful for her legs healing. Her pelvis and her hips really were what ached for the most part. Sometimes her back. Mostly her lower half though. She still remembered the days of being in such a drugged up phase while she healed in the beginning. Slipping in and out of sleep at random. She still fell asleep rather quickly sometimes, just because of how tired she gets through living her life. Her body expending a great deal of energy still healing and working out.

You were a hero. she said quietly.

They pulled into the zoo and told her his parents were eager to meet her. Causing the mood to lighten as she smiled. She loved how they were. Always joking and teasing one another. Always having fun, and looking out for each other. Neither of them was afraid to give it like it needed to be given when one or the other was being a complete idiot. She really appreciated that.

There weren't many men out there that would be able to handle a girl like Blue Tiran. She was headstrong, stubborn, and yet dedicated and loyal. She was a strange girl that was the most independant girl in the world until she needed someone and then she was a pile of mush. Complicated, she supposed they called it.

When they got to the front gates they paid their fare and stepped into the zoo. It was the perfect day for such a thing. There was just a slight breeze and the air had a slight chill that would be chased away when the sun reached it's height this afternoon. Blue wished she could hold his hand, but it was too hard to do that and use her cane so she stuch with sticking close to him. They walked up to the map. The 'you are here' was a big red arrow pointing to just inside the main entrance.

Oh. Let's go see the Tigers. I love those animals, always wanted one. she admitted to him as they began to set off for the 'cat' area of the zoo. Where the Cheetahs, Lions, and Tigers were kept.

She was quiet for the majority of the car ride, except for a murmured sentence about him being a hero. He doubted she knew he had heard her say it, but it made him smile and softly squeeze her thigh as they drove. Having slightly improved hearing from the implants had its advantages...also its distinct disadvantages. But that wasn't important now, the only mattered at the moment was that things were going to get better. Ethan could feel it.

They arrived and teased one another before entering the zoo and paroosed the map. Blue made the suggestion of heading to the 'cat' area, filled with the kings of the plains, the jungle, and of multiple children's hearts. As they got near the enclosures for the various types of large felines, the crowds of families and children swarmed them. Pushing, shoving, and running through their spare, Ethan simply glared at the smaller humans as they crashed past.

I hadn't anticipated this. Are you ok?

He held Blue's arm softly, he didn't want her to fall. There was a real fear of it, especially since the children seemed to have no regard for the safety of others as they stormed throughout the zoo grounds. He prickled with indignation. Didn't these cretins have parents!?

You'd think there would be more discipline. This type of lax system is exactly what caused the Enlightenment.

It was at this point he found himself merely speaking to himself, as he saw parents handling toddlers while trying to rein in the larger, more independent, children. He very nearly scoffed at the thought as they leaned against the railing to the tiger enclosure. Three of the striped beasts laid out in the sun, enjoying their day and generally ignoring the tourists that filled the enclosure rails.

Can you imagine? What a life...they probably know no stress like us. I dare say I am jealous of those furry creatures down there Blue. What do you think?

Children were going nuts.

Apparently, too much sugar for breakfast, or something. Maybe they were just not disciplined at all. Because 'Tommy stop! Stop this instant!' was obviously not working on which ever child had that unfortunate name. Blue looked over at John as he pulled her tighter to him. He was worried one of the kids might trip her up and Blue was not sure how she or her body would take a fall. She had been so careful at home, and this was their first real outting that wasn't a restaurant or work. So there was actual danger of her falling, and as unstable as she could be when her legs got tired, she had no idea, what she would do if she fell.

I am okay. I just, don't want to fall.

They made it around the children, and closer to the tiger enclosure. She was happy to stop for a moment and shifted her weight from one leg to the other to allow one to take a small break. She wasn't exactly sure if ill-behaved children children really were the cause of Enlightenment but she was certain that the attitude of 'tis someone elses problem' was definitely a big part.

I think, while being stress free, it has to be boring. Denying your instincts. Letting humans come so close, but so far. Watching people, meat, trudge by your cage day in and day out. I think it would be quite lonely.. actually. Or rather, perhaps it would just be more.. claustrophobic.

She watched the tigers. Their tails flopping up and down. they were lazy and seemed happy and content but Blue wondered if they really were. She understood the itch and feel.. the need to be free, to do what you really wanted to do. But being incapable of doing it. She turned and headed just slightly further, away from the children to where the lions were prowling around in a large enclosure. A huge male lay against the grass and there were several females and a small cub romping around in the tall grass. Blue smiled watching them.

Since the accident.. she said softly. I often wonder, if I'll be able to have kids.... The doctors say they can't be sure until I'm done healing.. whenever that will be.

They watched the tigers and Blue made some decent points about being stuck in the enclosure. He guessed he would be bored, seeing his life in such an enclosure. But then again...wasn't he already? His life, contained within the world of "Jonathon Rivers," a concrete enclosure to which he previously had no chance to escape from. Blue gave him that drive to change, that need to be himself.

They walked casually over towards the lions, and watched the larger lions paw around with the cub that kept seemingly causing trouble for its parents. Blue seemed to watch the cub with a sad, yet jubilant intent. Almost like the thought of the cub made her happy, but it brought dark thoughts.

Since the accident.. she said softly. I often wonder, if I'll be able to have kids.... The doctors say they can't be sure until I'm done healing.. whenever that will be.

"John" turned to look at Blue, now fully understanding her expression. Why was she worried about kids? It wasn't like their relationship was anywhere near children. That was assuming he even wanted little ones of his own...he had never really thought about it. He slid an arm around Blue's slim waist, nuzzling softly in her neck.

You can't worry about what you don't know, sweetheart. You'll drive yourself crazy. Besides, I know it will work out...I have faith. That, and I know you will be a wonderful mother someday. There is no need to rush it.

He kissed her cheek and turned her head toward his own until their eyes met.

Since the attack... he was clear to use different words, All I think about is that I almost lost you. I treasure every single moment I get, because it was almost the moments I lost...good or bad.

Blue snuggled into him back. Leaning on him a bit more than usual. Letting him take some of the weight off her body. She was doing fine but she would use whatever breaks she could in a day to help her get through.

I don't want to .. like have kids now. But, it's a thought that never crossed my mind until it might have been taken away.

He was right though. There was no reason to worry about anything. There had almost not been a future for them at all. She was lucky that the way she had done her lab, and the place she had been standing, she had not been completely crushed into bone meal. It had been close enough and that was a terrifying thought. She dreamed about the darkness a lot. She also felt inately scared of the dark now, when John wasn't with her. Which scared her, to be scared. She had never really been scared of anything before except abandoment. Which after her past, made sense.

She kissed him gently. Kissing him long and slow, before she broke it and smiled at him. They were lucky. She was lucky. She was even luckier that her sister was dating a healer. Because, that man had probably been the only reason she was walking. They moved on, and Blue was grateful to see that the polar bears were up in the next building and it had seating. They walk into the building, it's chilly because it's the artic building with penguins, seals, and polar bears, but she is eager to see the polar bears and to sit down for a little while

They make it to the exhibit and she sits down in the third row stretching her legs out on the row beneath them. Luckily, it's not too busy, most people walk past few sit and stare for a while. But there is something magcial about the polar bears. They're so beautiful. She had read once that while their skin looked white, it was actually clear. It only looked white because their undercoat was white, and the rest of it was clear giving that impression.

When I'm better. We should go on a real vacation. Like some place tropical. A beach, a .. crazy get away something like that. Or.. or maybe a cruise. I think they have those out of Port Okena. she admits as she leans back on her elbows on the bench behind them. I don't know, just thinking out loud I guess. We've never gone on a vacation, it would be nice. I might be tempted to leave Al at home. she bartered.

Blue leaned in on him, transferring some of her weight to him. He didn't mind as she rested on him, he wanted to afford her all the ease she needed. It was a specific risk coming out in public, and he was going to make it as easy as possible. She explained how she was scared about the kids thing because she had suddenly realized she may lose it. "John" nodded, completely understanding since he had been so worried about losing her.

They casually made their way to the arctic exhibits, a circular seated area that allowed zoo-goers to sit and watch penguins, seals, polar bears and the like for extended periods of time. For Ethan, the room was chilly, a refreshing change from the slightly warmer air outside. It was cooler, but not nearly as cold as the blasted ice lands known as Massachusetts. Plus, he knew that Blue did enjoy the polar bears, and based on her posture as she settled on to a bench, she needed a bit of a rest before continuing on.

When I'm better. We should go on a real vacation. Like some place tropical. A beach, a .. crazy get away something like that. Or.. or maybe a cruise. I think they have those out of Port Okena.

She leaned back on her elbows, and he looked down on her and raised an eyebrow. It seemed that the topic conversation would be free-for-all today. Blue seemed to notice his mildly critical expression and seemed a bit taken aback.

I don't know, just thinking out loud I guess. We've never gone on a vacation, it would be nice. I might be tempted to leave Al at home.

"John" chuckled and leaned down on his elbows to meet her level. A smile cracked his face as he leaned in for a quick, soft kiss.

You're already bartering by removing your owl from the picture? What makes you assume Albert would even be invited on our vacation?

He had a legitimate point...Ethan really didn't want that pecking blue bastard coming with them. It was hard enough getting close with her when he lived with them.

Besides, this is pretty big commitment, you know? A vacation together....are we pregnant or something?

"John" successfully held back his smiles and snickers to Blue's unamused face. She really didn't like her words used against her.

I mean, if that was supposed to be a surprise...you can still tell me later. I'm a pretty good actor.

You have no idea honey sometimes on how good I am.

She grinned.

You know how he is. He doesn't like to be left out. Besides, you never know when you might need a tool. He has a lot. she gave a shrug.

Then he went on about how big of a commitment it was to take a vacation together. She chuckled as he began to toss her words back at her. Normally, she didn't like it when he did that. Only when they made her mad. Mostly, like if they were having a fight, or an argument over something and he twisted something she said to make it work better for him. She hated that, it was a huge pet peeve of hers, and he was really good at it.

Blue leaned over and kissed him softly, three times.

Yep. Triplets.

It felt good. Today just had a good feeling about it. Something about being happy, being together, not being stuck inside. That was what she hated the most. Feeling like an invalid. Being stuck inside, working out or sleeping, or trying to soak her sore body. The problem was, she needed all those things, but for her mental sanity this was very good. Not to mention, she had a work bench in her garage that she worked at for a little while each day so that she could always do something. She had been working on home improvements while she was stuck on leave at work. She only hoped they didn't find a way to replace her or something while she was gone.

You never said if you were game for a vacation though...

She admitted to him. She hoped that he would be. Leaning over she put her head on his shoulder. Twisting her body just slightly enough so that she could cuddle with him while they watched the polar bears and let her legs rest. She wanted to see a great deal of the zoo and if she was going to keep John from putting her in a wheel chair and wheeling her around the damn place she was going to have to rest from time to time. She knew John understood and would actually, probably, be happy that she was trying so hard to take it easy instead of pushing herself.

But Blue had come to learn one thing. John did not appreciate her pushing herself when it came to her health. It was one thing to skip a meal, or only get a few hours of sleep. It was another to push her legs past healing and straight back into another injury. Thus, she was careful. Plus, mentally, as much as she wanted to rush back into her crazy, busy, hectic life, she knew that if she took it slow in the long run it would be better. So as hard as it was for Blue Tiran to lay low, she was doing just that.

I'm kinda glad Knightley made you be my bodyguard. Otherwise, we never would have met, and we never would be here, or together... she said with a soft smile her eyes watching the polar bears. She hadn't said the 'L' word yet, but she knew one day it was going to slip out. She had been with John for months, and it was hard to keep those kinds of feelings to herself anyway.

They relaxed together on the benches watching the polar bears lounge around in their 'ice' habitat., simply letting the time slip away. Ethan was really glad Blue had decided to take it slow today...she had this bad habit of thinking she could take on the world and do it all on her own. Regardless of her faults, Blue was a magnificent person, and he was happy to be in her life.

You never said if you were game for a vacation though...


He chuckled, kissing her softly on the forehead. I couldn't imagine of not going. I'm not going to let Albert have all the fun.

Talking about vacations, romance, everything...who could have ever imagined this as being the end of his mission. Hell, it would be the end of his career with Paladin. They wouldn't take kindly to one of their top agents deserting for, of all things, love. That, and he had recently explained he wasn't going to steal the data from Blue to his handler.

'Bulwark' didn't take too kindly to that particular news. It was a shame Ethan had to kill him. Then again, if someone tries to kill you, you try to kill them right back, self-defense at its finest. Ethan was faster, smarter, and quicker on the trigger than his handler and the other man had paid the ultimate price for it. Assuming they found the man's body, Paladin would be very curious as to his whereabouts very soon. That had made Ethan's decision all that more time sensitive.

I'm kinda glad Knightley made you be my bodyguard. Otherwise, we never would have met, and we never would be here, or together...

Oh, my dear...if you only knew. You will soon. I promise. We were destined to meet the second I received my briefing on you.

She snuggled in to him and gave him a small smile, which he returned with a light chuckle. Funny you should mention Knightley, he never hired me. I actually had met Knightley only hours before royally pissing you off that first day. My hiring came from substantially higher up.

In reality, Paladin had maneuvered in to the pockets of the Director of Security who, at the time, had quite the extensive gambling history. He wasn't a great predictor of outcomes. Similarly, he didn't anticipate the problems Ethan were causing him, explaining the constant harassment. That was alright though...the Director would get his in the end.

Let's go check out the safari tour, I hear you actually ride in the encampments.

They rose and walked slowly towards the "Librium City Safari," a ride through their 'Africa' habitat where patrons could view elephants, giraffes, and other endangered animals of the travesty of the Enlightenment. He wasn't sure if his responses earlier were going to cause a spark in Blue's mind...but either way, by the end of the day she would know who he was, and possibly who she wanted to be with.

Blue's brows furrowed at the mention that Knightley hadn't hired him. She didn't say anything at first. Because, she was confused. She had hacked, and hacked hard before she had let him into her world. Sure, he had been tired by Knightley, or so it had said, but that didn't mean she wanted him for long term. That also depended on how much about her work she was going to tell him about. She had brought him fully into her world. Because she trusted him, and, after hacking him in the beginning he had been eligable for such a thing.

Now Blue was left confused.

They got up and walked out of the artic exhibit and headed off towards the safari exhibit where they were supposed to have a bus-like thing that would take them through the actual exhibit. While they walked Blue was in thought. Just that one line. Shook a big crack into the foundation that she had built John up on.

Now she was kind of at a loss for what to think. Were the records tampered with. Or perhaps they wanted her to feel like he was hired by the same asshat that ran the division so she didn't have any questions. There certainly would have been a bit of a raised brow if the Director of Security or someone around him hired John rather than Knightley.

At the exhibit she got up onto the open topped van and found a seat about halfway down. She felt like the wind would be better back here. There weren't that many people at the zoo on a week day so she was able to put her legs up on the bench in front of them without anyone bitching about it. She rested her cane across them, just incase someone thought Blue was just lazy and not needing to rest her legs. Besides, she knew if she rested her legs John would be happy and wouldn't give her 'the look'.

Which until now, she thought only women possessed.

So... I'm confused. she said as they sat there waiting to make sure that no one else was in the mood to ride this thing today. Your files said that Knightley hired you, but you said he didn't, and now I'm vastly confused. Who did hire you and why was it covered up?

Blue had no idea that HE had anything to do with it. Her mind was actually on the thought that the company she worked for, New Dawn, was trying to cover something up. That the company had put John where they did on purpose and that there was a reason for it. The scary part was why. As hard as she had hacked there should have been something. Even an inkling of conspiracy or something, but there hadn't been. Which was so crazy... Blue just felt kind of shaken. She had always been so good at hacking, and maybe.. maybe she wasn't after all.

The walk to the safari exhibit wasn't exactly what Ethan had expected. Throughout the short trip, Blue seemed distracted, deep in thought. Ethan hadn't seen her like that in some time and it worried him. What had gotten her attention so thoroughly? Was it something he said? Did he let something slip too early? No. That was impossible. Ethan Kelly was an impeccable asset. He didn't make mistakes.

Then what is bothering her so much?

The safari tour wasn't very crowded. It was a weekday and the enclosed environment of the vehicle deterred parents from placing their loud, snotty, belliegerent spawn on such a long ride that had the potential to provide little to no entertainment at times. Peace was the name of the game, and he smiled at Blue when she stretched out on the bench on front of them. He was just happy to see her taking her injuries more seriously...even if the reasons were to keep "John's" nagging look to a minimum.

Blue's look of concentration and mild disbelief never faltered.

So... I'm confused. Your files said that Knightley hired you, but you said he didn't, and now I'm vastly confused. Who did hire you and why was it covered up?

The last thing Ethan wanted to do at this moment was lie. The whole point of this day was coming clean, having a fantastic day and starting a new life. His life....their life.

I was hired by the Director of Security at the time, about a month before he resigned. I can't say why they covered it up, maybe to make it an easier transition. Less questions?

Ethan skirted the truth on that one. He knew exactly why they were switched: so Blue wouldn't dig deeper. The hackers that provided the computerized identity package were great, and had designed multiple malicious programs used by humanity in the war and beyond. However, Blue Tiran had somewhat of a reputation. Paladin really didn't want to test it.

Why does it matter who actually hired me? The important thing is that I did get hired, and this was all possible. Can you imagine our lives if things had been different?

The safari ride had been moving now for nearly fifteen minutes, a vehicle with ok shocks riding through simulated African and Asian terrain. It wasn't the smoothest of rides. Ethan held her softly while they watched and looked for various animals. A large pachyderm herd was grazing near a large water hole, which Ethan was quick to point out to her. The ride took close to thirty minutes, and there were a surprising number of animals on the tour. It was an impressive display and Ethan was glad they did it. Once the vehicle stopped, he spoke softly in her ear.

You want to get out of here? We can sit in the park and relax if you want.

It seemed like the moment where they truly would be tested was vastly approaching...



...and Ethan couldn't have been more nervous.

So he was hired by the Director of Security. Before he was switched out. Her brows furrowed. Templeton had been the Director of Security for some time, then, a few weeks after John had been hired, he had left to retire and the new one had moved in. She wasn't even exactly sure who the new one was, but it didn't matter, it wasn't like she ever really had to deal with him herself. He sent Knightley to do all his harrassing which was something she was grateful to John about because since he had come to her lab he had stopped bugging her so much.

Well, I probably would be in my lab working my ass off, sleeping in the corner, and barely eating still. You know, the good days. she teased him. They both knew that despite the times they had a few fights over how much she worked, that they were both happier with the way things had worked out. What she also didn't say was that she would probably be dead. Not only in the dump, when she had saved his ife because he was saving hers... but, also because, of the whole.. building falling on top of her part of her history.

She snuggled into him as they moved through the rest of the ride. By the end she was tired of sitting on the horribly uncomfortable bench. At some point during the ride her legs had fallen asleep being elevated like they were so she had put her feet back on the ground to return the blood flow to the extremities. She was really eager for her body to get back to normal. She was lucky that she was half elf, she was healing up faster than she would have if she was completely human.

He asked if she was ready to go, and she nodded. She could not imagine trying to walk through the rest of the zoo especially with the massive influx of children today. Didn't they have to be in school?! She had no idea why parents did that whole home school thing. Maybe it was just to keep their kids at home and out of the 'great big evil world' or maybe it was because they didn't want to give up control. It was hard to know, but she assumed that's why school aged children were here in the zoo on a normal week day.

They got off the bus thing, and headed towards the entrance. There was a large park not too far away and Blue hoped for a bit of sunlight, a tree, and a nice quiet place to just sit down for a while. Maybe then they could go have lunch. She was still shocked by the whole.. John being hired by the DoS. Because, that wasn't in his file, and Blue had hacked really well. She did what she normally did. When she checked up on someone. She didn't dig super deep, because then she could find out all kinds of things, she glossed over the mass of information, and kept it at that.

But that information had been wrong. That made her mad. She didn't like being wrong.

Lets go find a sunny place to sit. Afterwards, maybe we can go get lunch. If I ever have children, they're going to school. she said absently as she looked over her shoulder at the children running unruly around while their parents were completely detatched. Why even keep them home from school if you weren't actually schooling them? She had no idea, it was lame, and she knew that she wouldn't do that to her children. They would be very intelligent. With a mother like her, and a father like John, they would be highly intelligent and skilled. She would want to kindle that spark into something amazing.

As they strolled towards the exit, they discussed further plans for the day. They agreed on the park for some relaxation before lunch. As they strolled from the zoo in to the park, Ethan squeezed Blue's hand. She smiled at him, still obviously distracted by the whole Director of Security thing. He hadn't anticipated this reaction from her about this particular topic...he didn't really see the reason to be upset. But then again, who was Ethan to tell anyone how to feel? It just didn't seem logical was all.

Lets go find a sunny place to sit. Afterwards, maybe we can go get lunch. If I ever have children, they're going to school.

A hearty, full laugh came from Ethan as they walked towards a large oak that seemed perfect for their purposes. Once they reached the tree, Ethan found a good spot that combined a good ratio of sun, breeze and shade. He sat and then helped Blue sit in between his legs so she could lean back on his chest. Laying his arms around her neck from behind, he wrapped her in a backwards hug and let her snuggle up.

Do you know why this is such a good day? Its a day that I really feel....free.

Ethan kissed her softly on the cheek whilst pulling his phone from his pocket.

Do you remember anything about the attack? The things you did and the things that occurred? The reason I ask is because you did something, and I'm very curious as to if you remember.

He showed her the text message from that day, telling him she loved him.

The real question is whether or not I have to get you on the brink of death for you to tell me that to my face.

((Another 'novel' for you, Tim))

They found a great spot underneath a tree. But there was sun coming through here and there from between the leaves. It really was a beautiful day. The sun was out, but there was a stiff breeze that came and went and with it brought a cool temperature so it wasn't too hot nor too cold. So long as you weren't in absolute shade. It was the perfect kind of day for the park.

Blue's elven side was happy here. Sunlight, trees, grass. It settled happily as Blue settled happily in John's arms. Leaning her back against his chest, she was content and comfortable. He said he felt 'free'. And in a way she could understand that. They weren't at work. Both of them had survived the horrors of the attack from an android of all things. Who ever had put piss in her artificial veins should be shot....

Blue had spent an entire afternoon repairing what needed to be fixed in John's arm. She had no idea what he had done to do this kind of damage. She hadn't really asked, she had just let out a long whistle at the damage and went to work. The second time she had used her rarely used dining table as an opperating table for him. This time it had been much more in depth. A great deal of his synthetic muscles and tendons had been torn. Some completely in half. The hydraulics in his arm had been basically ruined, and she was glad that she had extra parts.

Better parts, then whatever backwater shit the army had used to fix him up.

It had taken hours. He hadn't been asleep, there was no need. She had shut down his cybernetic sensors so he wasn't feeling anything anyway. The hardest part was reminding him not to move so she wouldn't accidentally stab or cut the whole damn thing off by moving the tools wrong.

Now he was all fixed up, and that arm was holding her. She supposed they were free.

He asked what she might remember from the attack. Blue pursed her lips and thought about it. He was asking her about something she might have done or said, and she shook her head.

The only things I remember clearly was... the building exploding.. then I blacked out for a while. I woke up for a short time at some point, but I couldn't do anything, and then ... the android connected with my mind... she was in pain. Then I started to black out again. I didn't wake up until the hospital.

He pulled out his phone and scrolled through to the texts and pulled up the text in question. Oh... She bit her lower lip and she turned bright red. Taking his phone in her hands she reread the text and her face grew a bright shade of read as she handed the phone back. He asked if he was going to have to nearly die again so that she would say such things to his face. Blue bit her lower lip, she doubted that she could turn any more red.

She twisted in his lap so that her side rested against his chest now. He was putting her majorly on the spot. Her mulit-colored eyes looked up into his, and then away. Then back.

I.. love you, John. she wasn't big on those words. Not really. Well she had always wanted to hear them, but there were times she had the strangest idea that if she didn't say them, then she didn't really feel them and it would be much easier to hurt less when they left. John had been with her for months and months now. At least six, probably more, she wasn't counting. All she knew was that she didn't feel like her life was really her life without him. He had become a lodestone in her life, and she supposed it was time to tell him.

To his face.

But now, the time would tell, if he would say it back. She imagined so, since, he had called her out on it. But the thing was, you could never be sure. Men were fickle and she and they had something in common. Feelings weren't easily talked about.

It seemed she did remember the text message.

Holding his phone over to her, Ethan watched Blue turn ever deeper shades of red. She gingerly took the phone from his hand, seemingly reading every letter, every moment, every intention, every feeling that was encapsulated in seven letters. Not thinking it was possible, Blue turned even more red. He chuckled softly, feeling the heat from her cheeks. Without much hesitation, she slowly turned to look in to his eyes.

Her eyes darted from his and then slowly returned. It was like she was a scared teenager! He found it absolutely adorable.

I.. love you, John.

Ethan let his blue eyes meet hers, seeing her feelings in those multi-hued orbs. He knew she was being legitimate and that was all that mattered to him. He smiled at her as his hand softly caressed the side of her face.

I love you too, Blue. More than you could possibly know...which I think is kind of the point of today.

Blue's confused look was expected, the information he had for her would be confusing and difficult to swallow. But it had to be done. He took a hand softly in his own, stroking the top of it with his thumb, never letting his eyes leave hers.

Ethan took one deep breath and sighed.

Love is so amazing, I feel like I can tell you anything, that you'll always be there. That there should be no secrets between us.

He paused for just a moment, that moment when his brain was analyzing everything one more time. He could be John Rivers. Why did John have to die? Why couldn't Ethan? It wasn't all that different, just a far lesser amount of shade to his work.

No...the truth will set freedom upon us all. That was something someone once said...Ethan was sure of it. Besides, it sounded really good.

So, from now on, no secrets. I haven't been completely honest with you, and its about time I have been...